I learned to be alone
To be alone can be understood in so many ways. It has so different meanings for people and an individual feeling deep inside for every person. What do you associate with being alone? What feelings arise when you here that word “ALONE”? Loneliness?
To me “being alone” has very divers meaning, as I felt like it was following me through my whole life ever since. It was not a problem to spend time alone, e.g. at a room, or to do something alone (as writing is something you actually need to be alone ;)). More than that it was the feeling of needing support or help, someone who pushes me to do something, someone who made my decisions. The older I got i started to reflect and the more I realized that about myself. And I decided that I wanted to change.
Who am I?
Step by step I learned to be alone without being lost. Without the feeling of being forgotten. Without others giving me a push. What I mean by that is, that I changed my personal view of being alone into something positive. I figured out, that the attitude of being attached to someone – not being able to handle or make decision on my own – the dependency – lead to the ugly truth, that I wasn´t myself at all. In fact: wasn´t doing what I liked, I did what others would suggest. I wasn´t being the real me. But a lot of things have changed since then and I am proud, that I realized my struggles and stood up for myself.
Being with myself.
Being alone does not come along with being lonely. Some people cannot handle the situation of being alone because they associate being alone with loneliness. But to me it is more finding yourself, finding who you are and what you want. Doing something alone does not implicate having noone! I do have my friends but I also enjoy some time alone and it has become an important part of my life.